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Provider of Time

I woke up Tuesday morning and found myself worrying about time.  For the next three days I had CGA in the morning, lunch, an hour to get homework and various tasks done and then work for 8 hours.  How was I going to have time for everything?  I got even more stressed out when I started thinking about my future, “How am I going to have time to work,  go to school, and do homework?  Working towards a Master of Arts will be a hundred times more demanding than CGA!”  On top of it all I was running late and found that I didn’t have time to do my Bible reading and rushed out the door discouraged.  When I arrived at Adventures, I looked around and saw hardly any cars…I was 30 minutes early.  I used that time to do my Bible reading and finished just in time to go inside.  I felt a little better.  I was waiting for class to start and I thought, “I’m so tired, I wish I wasn’t working so late so I could get more sleep.”  I was also behind on reading that was due the next day and was debating whether I would have to stay up to finish or just accept being behind.  Then it occurred to me that I was not working to 11pm like I had all the week before, but only until 10.  I was going to have an extra hour for sleep!  In class time, our speaker gave us an hour to ourselves to spend with the Lord processing things we needed to talk with Him about—more time given to me!  After class one of my fellow CGA apprentices asked me if I would be willing to do something for her.  She was going to be leading our worship/prayer time on Thursday in which we would be asking for words from the Lord for each other and said she wanted everyone to have a letter written beforehand.  She knew I was gifted in this area (and it’s a gift I’ve been wanting to use more and grow in) and asked if I would write a few.  I wanted to, but ultimately said no because I didn’t have time.  After I left, God convicted me and said, “Haven’t I been telling you all morning that I will give you time?”  I knew he was right and texted her and said I would do it (I promise I have good boundaries, see 2 blogs ago about saying “no”).  I went to work, came home, and saw in my CGA track’s group message that I was not behind in my reading, but right on track…no joke.  The next day I found myself exhausted at work…after being there for only 30 minutes with 7.5 hours left to go and an 8 hour shift the next day.  How was I going to make it?  I started to question my work and time load and what God was promising me.  Was I really going to get through without burnout?  I looked up and something I had seen before but God sharply drew my attention to in that moment was that all the tables in Chick-Fil-A had a vase of yellow flowers on them.  Yellow flowers are a special thing between the Lord and I and I felt him say in that moment, “I’m with you, don’t worry, I’ll get you through today.”  Throughout my shift I became less tired, or at least became less aware of it and I got through and had a full tank when I went in the next day.  God also gave me the time I needed to write those letters because class started an hour later than normal, so I used that time to get that done.

God is good.  Surrender your time to Him and He will give you the time you need.